If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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