Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
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