Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
