I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
