Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
