Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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