hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
