he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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