Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
My pussy is not your playground.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.