Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
