whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
