all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
im six kinds of drunk right now
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
