You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
