brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
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