lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
