If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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