you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
