It's like a parade of train wrecks.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Randomize
