The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
