Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
