Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize