Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
