I queefed so loud it echoed.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
