just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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