Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
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