3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
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We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
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I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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