he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
