You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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