Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
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