My nipple is on Facebook.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize