ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
