This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
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