my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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