he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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