rhymes with "ouble enetration"
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Randomize