She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Randomize
