I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Randomize
