You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
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