It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
