im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Randomize
