honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
