I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
