Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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