you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize
