I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
