I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize