you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
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He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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