I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize