what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
