So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize